An Anxious, Confusing Erotic Dream
Dream
William Yang, the gay, Chinese photographer, is going to photograph me being examined at the medical school. I am lying, completely naked on the examination bed and I am being examined by a young man and he is also naked. The tutor and the rest of the class are watching on, they are all fully clothed and so is William Yang. During the examination I fall asleep and I have an erotic dream which causes me to have an erection. I suddenly wake up (in the dream) and I find that I am in my parents bed in the old family home. I am feeling anxious and confused by this. Did that examination actually happen or was it just a dream? Did William Yang take those photos and will they be exhibited in public? I have a feeling that someone from the examination is in the room with me. I want to go and retrieve a pair of my pants but they are in another room in the house but I am feeling anxious about walking through the house naked and especially as I have an erection. But it is very early in the morning and everyone will be sleeping. I walk out of the room and walk past my old bedroom but my mother is sleeping in that room and she is awake and wants to know why am I awake at this hour and she tells me to go back to bed. I tell her to go back to sleep. It is very dark so she can't see that I am naked. I continue onto the other room and look for my pants. I then realise that my mother died last September so she can't be in this house. The End.
image from: martha-dominguez-de-gouveia-k-NnVZ-z26w-unsplash-scaled.jpg
Dream notes and associations
William Yang is a gay Chinese photographer, who chronicled the lives of many gay men during AIDS epidemic. Last night before going to sleep I watched Hannah Gadsby's documentary; "Nakedly Nudes", a history of the nude body in art. William Yang was one of the artists she interviewed. Reminds me of the morning glory dream were I am feeling anxious about the family knowing that I spent night with the prostitute. Also the dream where I discover that I am naked in the market place and I feel frightened and confused. And another dream where I wake up (in the dream) in the bed with my mother feeling confused, not knowing where I am or what day it is. Also there was a sexual dream I once had, the night before I modelled at the medical school. And when I was lying on the examination bed I dozed off and had a daydream where someone from the previous night's dream came into the room and examined my penis causing me to have an erection. But no one else noticed.
My feelings throughout the dream and on awakening
erotic, confused, anxious, fear of exposure
My feeling is that this is a positive dream, even though I feel anxious and confused. I am beginning to notice in dreams, that we act out situations that don’t normally happen to us or unusual situations. How would I feel if William Yang, a well known photographer, wanted to photograph me at my work at the medical school and then exhibited those photos in a public exhibition. I have had some erections at the clinic and lived to tell the tale. Of course I will have to consider what happened to me as a teenager as the original cause of any angst that I have around erections in view of other people. I should acknowledge that and move on. Which I appear to be doing in relation to your comment on the change in my naked dreams. And yes I can now see that change. Thank you for pointing it out
Hi Lindsay, this dream reminds me of ‘The Dermatologist’ and your memories associated with the book of naked boys. The part where you are naked in the presence of your mum but she can’t tell in the dark also seems significant.
Some emergent phenomenon After listening to your audio recording I dozed off and had the following dream: The setting is suburbia on the edge of the Australian bush. A suburban street with neat little houses and gardens. The houses remind me of the coloured blocks from the meeting with Martina II, the Bashing dream, but the colours of the houses were more subdued. Where the asphalt street meets the bush it becomes a sandy gravel tbush track. Close by is a large pond. This is where I am. completely naked and I am conscious that I am naked and visible to anyone nearby. I enter the pond and bathe myself. The bathing felt like a ritual